Saturday, November 05, 2011

Super Villains for Issue 2

Ohio's government passed legislation this past year to strip public employees of collective bargaining rights, the ability to strike and negotiate for safe staffing levels among other things.  Signatures were gathered and a repeal, Issue 2, was placed on the ballot to be voted on this next Tuesday.  Naturally, an influential demographic has stood strong against these efforts.  I speak of course of super villains.  They were kind enough recently to do a photo shoot.

The Dark Lord Sauron has long opposed collective bargaining and all forms of union labor.  Imagine being in his situation, managing thousands of orcs, and have them start complaining about sulfur gas.  HELLO, they're right next to a freaking volcano!  Of course, there's sulfur gas.  What can he do about it?  Not much.

Voldemort  has similar concerns.  Sure, he looks happy in this photograph, but inside, he's crying.  Voldemort, you see is among the much persecuted one-percent.  He worked hard to get where he is, ruling over a psuedo-dictatorship, and persecuting filthy mudbloods.  Under this new law however, half-breeds would have a say in their salaries.  Imagine, what this would do to yet another fragile Dark Lord.  His pockets would be emptied.  He would no longer be able to purchase elaborate fountains displaying the muggle and house-elf's feebleness in relation to wizards.

Lastly, we have Ganon.  Ganon is a Gerudo-born villain, seeking the Triforce and absolute power over Hyrule.  But he has a problem.  Public employees stand in his way.  Firemen, police and others arrest his monsters in a constant assault.  Without the ability to maintain safe staffing levels, however, they will quickly be overrun.  And Ganon will recreate the world in his image, making Lon Lon Ranch into an efficient distopia.


  1. Love the pictures. I was at the first rally at the Columbus state house. Hope you Ohioans manage to get the bad guys under control.

  2. Oh, wow, that's amazing. I wish I could have attended.


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