The Crime

“Did you hear the news?” a mid-twenty something blonde man said, sitting next to a brunette woman roughly the same age.

“How could I not?”

“Did it surprise you?

“Of course it did.”

He held a paper in one hand and gently put it down on the table.  The brunette woman winced, but otherwise showed little emotion.

“How are you so calm over this? You dated him for Christ sake.”

“You were his best friend for I don’t know how many years.”

“Well, people change I guess.”

“Apparently.  The Jeff I knew would never–“ She trailed off.  The reality of the situation appeared to hit her all at once.

“It’s okay, Beth.  It’s nothing you did.”

“I know that, Todd!  I’ve told myself that since the moment I heard.”

“But you don’t believe it.”

“No.  There has to be something I could have said that might have made the slightest difference.”

“There wasn’t.”

“But all those families…”

“BETH!  There wasn’t!  Let it go.”

“That’s easy for you to say.  You didn’t sleep with him.”

“Do you really think that gives you some magical insight into the workings of his later deranged mind?”

“Something was there then; it had to have been.  Maybe if I had just made him cum a little better…”

“I’m sure he cummed spectacularly.  At least that’s what he told me the next day.”

“You dog!” Beth shrieked, throwing a pillow.

“Hey, women tell each other just as much.”

“Not that way.”

“What way is that?”

“You know,” Beth said, impersonating a male voice, “I totally banged this girl last night.  She squealed like a piggy.”

“He didn’t say it like that.”

“How did he say it?  No, never mind, I don’t want to know.”

“You sure?”

“Yes.  No.  Yes.  Fine, just tell me.”

“He said he slept with the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on and he was truly happy for the first time in his life.”

“No way.”

“Yes way.”

“What did you say back?”

“I believe my exact words were ‘Dude… weak!’”

“That does sound like your teenage self and come to think of it your current self.”

“It was really corny.”

“And romantic.”

“But mostly… corny.”

“I don’t understand then, why he broke it off and left.  You’ve got to know more than what you’ve told me.”

“The last thing he said was he needed to get out of town to work some stuff out.  I didn’t see him after that; no one did.  He vanished into thin air.”

“He didn’t call… or text?”

“Like I said… nothing.”

“Did they say what happened to him?  I couldn’t finish reading the article.”

“It wasn’t pretty, Beth.”

“What do you mean?”

“You knew Jeff.  He was always the determined sort.  No one was going to take him alive if he didn’t want them to.”

“You mean?”

“I’m really sorry.  I had a hard time accepting too but it’s done.  The Jeff we knew died long before that night.”

“I can’t believe that.”

“Why not?  No friend of ours could possibly do such heinous things.  He changed.  Became another person.”

“I got a phone call from him,” Beth interjected, “a year or so after he left.  He hung up after a few seconds but I knew it was him.”

“Honestly, Beth that could have been any pervert!”

“It was him.  I knew.”

“And you didn’t report this to the police?  You know what he did!  What he was doing even then!”

“I agonized over it, believe me.”

“Obviously not enough.  You never mentioned this.”

“I didn’t think you’d understand.  I was kind of right in a way.”

“I’m not the unreasonable one!  You aided and abetted a criminal!”

“Really?  I had no solid proof it was him.  He didn’t say a word.  Do you think the police would have done anything but laugh?”

“No… I suppose not.”

“They’d probably think it was a long time coming.  Little girl can’t get over her heartthrob who ran away and became…”

Todd put his arm around her shoulder.  “Do you remember the police questioning us?”

“Yeah, they tried to get something, but they were from the same town.  They knew everything we did.”

“It’s a shame things didn’t work out differently.  He deserved what he got, I won’t deny, but still…”

“Are you sure?  They shot him in cold blood.  He didn’t have a chance to defend himself.”

“Beth, don’t start feeling sorry for him.  It’ll only make things harder.”

“I suppose so.  I guess I’m still holding onto who he was before all this; that smart, bright guy I fell in love with.”

“It’s hard letting go.  He was my best friend; always there for me no matter what.”

Todd picked himself up from the couch with a sigh, grabbing the newspaper.  He kissed Beth on the head and walked slowly to the door before pausing. 

“What is it, Todd?”

“I still can’t believe he was gay.”

The Raving Moonbat

I've started a new political blog.  It's called the Raving Moonbat and it's pretty... liberal.  So, if you like that sort of thing and want more you should totally stop over man.  We can talk about world peace and eat these brownies I made.  I won't tell you what's in them though.

Caged

The bear ate honey in the forest.  Or what it thought was a forest.  The limbs flickered and a blowing sound emitted from the floor.

“Don’t mind the noise,” a soothing voice said.  “Get back to doing bear stuff.”

“What sort of bear stuff?” The bear replied.

“You know… fishing, hunting, playing with your friend Piglet?

“I’m sorry.  That’s not me.  I need to feel motivated.  What’s my motivation?”

“You don’t need motivation; you’re already a bear!”

“You’re a human but I’m not expecting you to act like Roy Rogers and Clint Eastwood.  How ignorant!”

“Jeff,” the voice whispered.  “Turn on the gas.  It looks like another won’t cooperate.”

“Whatever you say, Bill.”

A green cloud began to fill the room.  The bear merely continued staring at horizon it had figured out was two-way glass.  Impending death had not changed its demeanor, but rather gave a curious expression in the place of fear.

“I surmise,” choked out the bear as its lungs began to give, “you’d like to know what you’ve done wrong in this experiment.”

“We don’t need advice from lesser mammals.  If you were intelligent at all you’d be the one gassing us.”

“I’m going to tell you, regardless.  The obvious explanation is you can’t play God expecting results in your favor; the less obvious being, bears will generally eat fish over honey in their environment.”

The room became completely obscured with gas.  The bear did not use the situation to its advantage for escape, however.  It merely lied down as if going to sleep, happy to have the hard part of its journey over with.

“That one sure didn’t put up a fight.”

“You expected it to?”

“Well, yeah, wouldn’t you?”

“I’m human; my life means more.”

“But will your death in the end?”

“Really!?  You’re getting pretty philosophical.”

“Let’s just bring in the next bear.”

Another bear walked out identical to the first in appearance.  It was not clear where the corpse of the other had gone.

“What do you say we let this one live for a while, maybe get it some fresh fish?”

“I’d say you’re losing your nerve.”

“Didn’t you hear what that other bear said?”

“No.  You heard a bear talking?”

“Yeah,” Bill said nervously.  “Didn’t you?”

“I think you need a break…”

“No… please… I’m really all right!”

These were the last words Bill remembered speaking to Jeff.  He slowly opened his eyes inside the bear pen that was no longer a bear pen.  Bill was back in his college dorm room.  The familiar swimsuit calendar hung on the wall with posters of his favorite bands.  He ran up to his roommate, Zach, he hadn’t seen in nearly twenty-years.  "Hey, man, want to go play some Frisbee in the quad?"  Zach didn't respond.  Bill noticed him flicker.  A familiar blowing sound emitted from the floor.

Bill felt his lungs begin to seize.  The room was filled with greenish haze.  He ran with all his strength toward where he thought the two-way glass must have been.  When he fell over, he crawled.  Jeff was not ready to die.  He refused to accept it.  The lights were dimming; he knew it had nothing to do with the electricity.

As he lay, finally immobilized, he saw the other bear, the dead bear, sitting where his friend had been mere moments before.

“Help me!  Please!  I can save you too!”  Bill thought more than talked.  He was barely capable of whispering.

“So naïve,” the bear said before vanishing and leaving Bill to his fate.

Rainbow Baby

That girl with the golden smile

Ain’t so pearly white;

I’ve seen her cry her silver tears,

Sacrifice ‘til black and blue.

Red blood shot eyes

And thoughts of grey

In ultra-violet spectrums,

We can’t see but know are there;

Indigo’s a myth that we hold onto.

I’ve seen the rainbow’s spectrum lie,

Or maybe it has always told the truth

And we’re too blind, too quick

To get the bigger picture.

Something in the arch is lost

In the horizon’s translation;

Blue trails off to meet
The hardened smile of a girl.

.

Night Poems

Ben Ditmars' chapbook of poetry, Night Poems is now Available on Amazon for Kindle and Print.

So, I'm considering this new project.  It might have and probably has been done in some way before but I think I can put my own unique spin on things.  My goal is to write a book of poems written at night in different places, instances, etc.  I'm of the opinion that everything is that much more interesting after the sun goes down and everyone's asleep.  Let me know what you all think.  If anyone wants me to send them some of what I'm working on, I'd love to do that too and get your opinions that way.

Super Villains for Issue 2

Ohio's government passed legislation this past year to strip public employees of collective bargaining rights, the ability to strike and negotiate for safe staffing levels among other things.  Signatures were gathered and a repeal, Issue 2, was placed on the ballot to be voted on this next Tuesday.  Naturally, an influential demographic has stood strong against these efforts.  I speak of course of super villains.  They were kind enough recently to do a photo shoot.

The Dark Lord Sauron has long opposed collective bargaining and all forms of union labor.  Imagine being in his situation, managing thousands of orcs, and have them start complaining about sulfur gas.  HELLO, they're right next to a freaking volcano!  Of course, there's sulfur gas.  What can he do about it?  Not much.

Voldemort  has similar concerns.  Sure, he looks happy in this photograph, but inside, he's crying.  Voldemort, you see is among the much persecuted one-percent.  He worked hard to get where he is, ruling over a psuedo-dictatorship, and persecuting filthy mudbloods.  Under this new law however, half-breeds would have a say in their salaries.  Imagine, what this would do to yet another fragile Dark Lord.  His pockets would be emptied.  He would no longer be able to purchase elaborate fountains displaying the muggle and house-elf's feebleness in relation to wizards.

Lastly, we have Ganon.  Ganon is a Gerudo-born villain, seeking the Triforce and absolute power over Hyrule.  But he has a problem.  Public employees stand in his way.  Firemen, police and others arrest his monsters in a constant assault.  Without the ability to maintain safe staffing levels, however, they will quickly be overrun.  And Ganon will recreate the world in his image, making Lon Lon Ranch into an efficient distopia.

A Love Story in 500 Words

“I’ll just hurt you” said Max.

“And why is that?” Jesse replied, crossing her arms.

“I just know, all right?”

“No, I don’t think you do.  It’s fear of commitment plain and simple.”

“I wish it only were…”

“What does that mean?”

“I’m bad news Jessie.”

“Like a robbery or tsunami?”

“Worse.”

“You presume to think a relationship with you is the equal to mass displacement and death on a scale to rival Haiti or New Orleans?”

“Of course.  And now you see the gravity of the situation.”

“Your arrogance?”

“Precisely, among other things.”

“I’ve dated arrogant men before; men that really were.  You just think you are.”

“Obviously those relationships didn’t work, so why would you think this one has a shot?”

“Why do you say that?  They worked.  I parted pleasantly with several, it was only circumstance, distance and the like.”

“Sure.”

“Stop minimalizing everything I say!”

“Can’t help it.  I’m an ass.  Is that really the sort of man you should keep chasing after?”

“I think there’s something deeper you’re not saying; some inner fear or insecurity.”

“Contrary to the female’s popular belief, men really aren’t that deep.  We tell it like it is unless we’re cheating.”

“Are you cheating then?”

“How would I do that?  I’m not involved with anyone.”

“What about me?”

“Well, apart from your mental candyland, no.”

“That really hurts.”

“It doesn’t have to; find someone who’s right for you.”

“But that’s YOU!  You’ve got to realize that by now!”

“I didn’t want to tell you this but… I have a dark past.”

“How dark?

“Deep space.”

“I highly doubt that.”

“I’ve killed and I’ll do it again!”

“Then kill me.  Go ahead.  I have nothing to live for if you reject me.”

“But all I’ve done is reject you and if I’m not mistaken you’re still kickin.’”

“Fine,” Jesse mumbled, making her way to a nearby drawer.  She drew a large bread knife and held it to her throat.

“What are you doing?”

“If you don’t kiss me by the time I count to ten I’ll drench the carpet with my blood.”

“Honestly,” replied Max stepping toward her.  Jesse held the knife closer.  Blood trickled from a slight cut.  “Put the knife back, already!”

“One!” she screamed.

“Don’t make me beg!”

“Two!”

“This won’t change anything!”

“Three!”

“I’d only be kissing you to save a life!”

“Four!”

“Jesse, okay, I’ll admit it; I feel something but it’s very deep and barely there.”

“Five!”

“Also, it’s impractical to act on!”

“Six!”

“Please, stop!  I’ll only ruin you!”

“You’ll ruin me either way at this point, at least with one of them I’ll be alive!  Seven!”

“This is insane!  Take a breath and calm down!”

“Eight!”

“Jesus, Jessie!”

“Nine!”

“You win!  I’ll kiss you all night and for the rest of my life if I have to!”

“Good,” said Jesse, returning the knife to its drawer.  Max strode over, grabbing her around the waist.  She smiled as they kissed; all night.